Steven of Oslo suggests DIY as the topic for this week’s episode so if you’re looking for the audio equivalent of a double-treaded sub-insulated Type D prog-backed 9mm helix arched reverse spiral pentagonal retaining bolt shackle with adjustable nose you’ve come to the right place.With thanks to our editor Laura Grimshaw. Join our PATREON for ad-fr…

We will never know if Guy Fawkes’ grim end would have changed had his barrister not gone for the “He only wanted to make the Houses of Parliament lukewarm” defence. Perhaps Mr Fawkes himself would have drawn comfort from the fact that, thanks to Georgia of York, he is now (and for the first time ever presumably) memorialised in podcast form: a medi…

A bean sharp scalpel is applied to a literary classic this week as Robin from Weymouth suggests the topic of Peter Pan. Could we have had Darth Vader without Tinkerbell? Could we have had a robo-handed Luke Skywalker without Captain Hook? Where does Chewbacca fit into all this? Answers on a postcard please. Join our PATREON for ad-free episodes and…

The railway is this week’s topic thanks to Nick of Kent (which for our international listeners is “The Garden of England” according to Kent. It is also unusual as a county as it categorises each man born in Kent as either a “Kentish Man” or “Man of Kent” depending on which side of the River Medway they were born: a taxonomy which wilfully excludes …

To date the indisputable peak of human scientific endeavour has been managing to hide a bonus track on a CD. The natural next summit is to hide a bonus door on an advent calendar. Will we see this achieved in our lifetime? Unlikely. Therefore please console yourselves with this bonus episode of Three Bean Salad, not hidden but visible and available…

Tis the Yule and Jacob from Manchester very cannily suggests hippos as this week’s topic. In Aesop’s fable, the hippo is humiliated by being left out of any accounts of the Nativity and, according to Hans Christian Andersen, rather than sharing its feelings with its closest friend, the Little Mermaid, retreats to the Nile and dedicates itself to be…

Annie of Cork City reckons it’s high time the beans talked monuments and who could argue with that? Tune in for a lukewarm take on this zeitgeistiest of topics which incorporates everything from art to politics to nougat. Join our PATREON for ad-free episodes and a monthly bonus episode: www.patreon.com/threebeansalad With thanks to our editor Laur…

Most of us can only dream of the splendour of the internal spaces occupied by London’s elite. A lucky few might have a neighbour who’s made it big on the pools, bought one of those glossy magazines with photos of a Londoner in their parlour and invited the whole street round to have a squiz. This week on the Three Bean Salad Podcast, the beans are …

Steven of Utrecht gets the beans wagging them tongues about the Netherlands to kick the new season off. And why the bloody hell not? After all the beans have all visited that great nation in the past and therefore it’s safe to assume each has taken a deep, deep, deep dive into its history, culture and miscellaneous to the point where an informative…

No normal episode of Three Bean Salad this week (we're away until December). Join our PATREON for ad-free episodes and a monthly bonus episode: www.patreon.com/threebeansaladPor Three Bean Salad

No normal episode of Three Bean Salad this week (it's a five Wednesday October and we only do four episodes a month - take it up with our lawyer, Julian Calendar) Join our PATREON for ad-free episodes and a monthly bonus episode: www.patreon.com/threebeansalad Merch now available here: www.threebeansaladshop.com Get in touch: threebeansaladpod@gmai…

Put your seat back into the reclining position (but only if you have the express consent of the person behind you who has also ideally reclined their seat with the express consent of the person behind them ad infinitum etc), shove a lukewarm bean in each ear and enjoy a third bean as a mid-flight snack for only €79.99 for Joe from York has suggeste…

Dan from Bremen chooses sharks for this week’s topic as well he might. After all, just as the shark is a perfectly evolved apex predator, so is the bean a perfectly evolved apex legume. No one wants three sharks to team up: that would simply lead to a bloodbath. Three beans on the other hand means a lukewarm banter bath and everyone’s invited (spec…

True to form, Tutankhamun from the Nile Delta has selected the pyramids as this week’s topic. Were these structures named after the shape or was it the other way around? Were they meant to be that shape in the first place or did they just run out of bricks? If they’ve REALLY been there for thousands of years how come they aren’t totally covered in …

Adverts: lifeblood of the nation, engine of the economy, coal of the mind. What could be more splendid then than a podcast episode which already contains adverts also being about adverts? Thank you to Andrew from Leeds for feeding this suggestion into the bean machine for a listening experience which flicks a cold, hard finger-swear at the skip-for…

It’s drive time on Bean FM and this week the lukewarm hits are in the key of “pasta” thanks to Matt of Bremen! We’ve got all the latest celebrity gossip, updates from Bonjamin’s traffic drone, weather from The Onion Child, something about sport presumably and unlimited adverts!! Call 0800-RIGATONI now with your crazy pasta story and you could win a…

The beans doff their caps (FUNGUS PUN!) to Adam of Bremington Spa for providing this weeks topic: mushrooms. What (or who???) are mushrooms? And why? And how come none of the other podcasts are getting to grips with them? Fear? Lobbyists? No matter. Just sit back, chuck some beans together with some mushrooms in a pot, set the hob to lukewarm and l…

Looking for a clear explanation of the syncopated contrapuntal elaboration of static half-diminished harmony tritone substitution turnaround? Then look no further as Cameron of Milton Keynes has the beans talk about jazz this week and, unless some sort of technical catastrophe has taken place resulting in a comprehensive explanation and discussion …

Play this episode directly in front of a mirror and no reflection of it shall ye see because this episode, the first of season fourteen, is all about vampires thanks to Stan of Manchester. Little is known of the elusive Stan of Manchester other than he always travels with 50 boxes of Transylvanian soil. Make of that what you will. Join our PATREON …

No normal episode of Three Bean Salad this week (we're away until September). Join our PATREON for ad-free episodes and a monthly bonus episode: www.patreon.com/threebeansaladPor Three Bean Salad

No normal episode of Three Bean Salad this week (it's a five Wednesday July and we will only do four Wednesday episodes in a month on the basis of hard won workers' rights) Join our PATREON for ad-free episodes and a monthly bonus episode: www.patreon.com/threebeansalad Merch now available here: www.threebeansaladshop.com Get in touch: threebeansal…

This week the beans are scraping away the topsoil of knowledge and softly brushing away the woodlice of friendship to reveal a hoard of lukewarm banter for your pleasure. This is all thanks to Pat from Ely who buried archaeology into the bean machine in the distant past naively assuming it would never be disturbed and would be allowed to rest in pe…

"Why is that Wikipedia doesn’t bother having any pages about aquatic craft these days?”, you might ask if you’d had your head stuck in a honey badger’s front porch for the last 3 years. The answer, of course, is that people come to Three Bean Salad for comprehensive data batches on this subject as well as the very hottest of takes. Previous “search…

Rebecca from (The?) Wirral selects haircuts as this week’s topic for the beans. Presumably this was a cynical attempt to silence Henry for an episode - an attempt which, of course, failed. Rebecca has been referred to the Bean Standards Select Committee and is suspended without pay pending their findings. Join our PATREON for ad-free episodes and a…

This week, Bonjamin Partridge centralises power, unilaterally suppresses any viable opposition and brings all bean media under executive control. “Big deal!” we hear you cry. “He’s just tapping into the Zeitgeist!”. Perhaps you’re right. Perhaps such a man understands that the people need to hear a story about a hot air balloon ride even when they …