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Black Marriage Therapy

Black Marriage Therapy

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If you desire to be married, are in the premarital stage of your relationship, or are currently married this podcast is for you. Your host Christ-Lynn Smith becomes a student of marriage with you as she discusses various topics in marriage like communication, sex, intimacy, finances, commitment, and many more. She leans on her experiential knowledge as a champion of marriage for almost 10 years, what she studies as a current Marriage and Family Studies student, and information she gleans fro ...
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We are Mikey and Randie Chapman, and your hosts of the Black Millennial Marriage Podcast. This podcast was created as a way to stay connected to one another. It was also formed so that we could have representation, meet other couples, and provide a space to talk about our 10+ years of relationship experience, including our years of marriage, and all we’re learning, unlearning, and loving about marriage.
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Greg (White) and Sydney (Black) work for Marriage Works! Ohio and specialize in the area of marriage & relationships. Through their discussions together, they found that often couples struggle with many similar problems in their relationships. However, sometimes there are differences. Sometimes subtle, sometimes not so subtle but definitely distinct differences. Gender differences, stage of life differences, as well as cultural differences. This podcast offers a front row seat to their discu ...
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Hey y’alllllllll! The Chapmans are out of the Bat Cave and want to tell you all about it. In this episode they discuss Randie’s revelation, Mikey’s heart felt intentions, and the thing that finally made them realize they need to QUIT the house buying process (for now). Later, the couple gives out Patreon Superlatives to their most engaged Patrons o…
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Hey y'all! Mikey and Randie are sick right now, but would never leave you hanging. So tune in for a raw and unedited version of "Plastic Off the Sofa". These kinds of episodes don't have any music or any edits, and they are a favorite of those on Patreon because listeners get a BTS look into what crafting an episode is like. This episode in particu…
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Like Saturn, the sisters have returned to one another. Tune in for this extra special Indie where Randie interviews her baby sister, Bri. In this episode they discuss their childhoods, and Bri reveals what little Bri wants from Little Ran. Later, Bri talks about what going no contact with certain family members has taught her, what she does to take…
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Hey y’all! With just a few more episodes left for this season, Mikey and Randie are back with an update. In this episode, they detail what’s been going on with them. They shed light on weight loss and gain, new projects, layoffs, and more. But what they also really want is for you to tell them what YOU have been up to. It’s getting closer and close…
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Whether you're a man seeking personal growth or a partner invested in the success of your relationship, this episode is a must-listen. Join us in this transformative episode as Rex, a licensed LMFT & Relationship coach, unveils the essential blueprint for men to thrive in their most critical roles within a marriage. We delve into the three fundamen…
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Sometimes despite best intentions and love for one another, we may find ourselves in a situation where we are continuously hurting one another and drifting farther and farther away. In this episode, we dive into the topic of emotional disconnection and connection. We also talk about a technique called "repair" in the context of moment-to-moment con…
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So what had happened was…Randie’s mom heard her Indie episode, Mothering Myself. And like, duh right? That was always a possibility. And still..Randie was scared shitless. Tune in to hear about the creative block Randie's been experiencing, her thoughts on her own cowardice behavior, and what finally accepting her safety means for her. She wonders……
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Therapy, for a lot of us in the black community, can be taboo. Often times speaking to a stranger about our problems and our relationships can be an intimidating journey filled with uncertainty, vulnerability, and self-discovery. But today, we're here to help peel back some of the layers on the idea of therapy for your relationship and peek into wh…
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Hey y'all, Hey! It's a good day for a throwback. And in this episode the Chapmans highlight BMM EP 059: Why Do Millennials Fall in Love? Do you remember that episode? It was a lot of fun and Mikey and Randie wanted to share the unedited version of that episode with you. In this episode, Randie reads a listener’s love story that started at Sonics, i…
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Hey y’all! Tune in for the Chapman’s first mini episode this season. As a reminder, Minis are all about their experiences as parents and in this episode Mikey and Randie reveal what parenting Drew has made them realize about their childhoods. The list ranges from being hit a lot to, in some cases, wishing they had the parents they wanted. It’s a fu…
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In our relationships, there are times when we need to sit down and talk about tough stuff. But, sometimes, we avoid these conversations because we don't know how to start them, we're scared of how the other person will react, or we hope the problem will just disappear. Sometimes, we're even unsure about our own feelings and how to explain them. We …
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A few months ago I was on a high I felt like I was working on everything that I wanted to accomplish and out of nowhere I just stopped. I made excuses and told myself it was because I'm tired, or I needed a break or work-life balance. 4 weeks went by and I was getting worse and worse and moving further and further from my goals. I accepted my behav…
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Hey y’all! Was a pastor featured on the BMM podcast on your Bingo card for 2023? It certainly wasn’t on Mikey and Randie’s, but seeing as this season’s theme is “Lemonade” the Chapmans are committed to acknowledging the nourishment all around them. Enter Kristian A. Smith, a man who wears many hats, and is also the host of the Holy Smokes Spiritual…
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Dive into the world view of men with Junior Smith & Mychael Starke as they reveal the essence of empathy in relationships. In this episode, these men discuss (in detail) things like how to recognize emotions, balance understanding without mere agreement, and the impact of external stresses on our empathetic responses. Listen in to learn more and eq…
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🚨Trigger Warning🚨: This episode delves into a sensitive topic and discusses instances of sexual abuse. Listener discretion is advised. Today, we're honored to be joined by the inspiring Sherell Harmon. In this deeply heartfelt conversation, we'll be exploring Sherell's journey through moments of pain and adversity, marked by experiences of childhoo…
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Hey, (in our best Mikey voice), he’s back. It’s been over a year since Mikey dropped an indie and in this episode he reveals where he’s been and how working on his latest project— his 1978 Monte Carlo Landau—is healing him. Tune in as Mikey nerds out with some history about the car, details the story of his cousin Quacy a.k.a. Chess gifting him the…
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In this episode, we welcome Schelo, a seasoned finance expert and CEO of Black Women Invest. With 8+ years of industry experience, Schelo has cultivated a community of over 13 thousand women, all united in their quest to learn about investing and wealth building. Having recently celebrated her marriage, Schelo brings a unique insight into financial…
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Hey y’all! In this episode, Mikey and Randie detail their most recent relationship breakthrough. It started with an argument and turned into a moment of vulnerability. And it’s all thanks to that damn word chart. Later, Randie brings a fight or flight questioning Mikey about therapy. But it’s all love, when in the end they show each other some PDA.…
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A marriage without faith is not sustainable. I know that is a politically charged statement for some but hear us out. We have been on both sides of the spectrum where we have done it without God, and we've done it with God and we have found that our relationship has thrived and grown in ways we could have never imagined because we put Christ at the…
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Hey y’all! In this episode Randie interviews her sex and intimacy doula, Yanitza. Together they droid out over their pleasure muse THE Janelle Monáe, discuss the shame surrounding sex, pleasure, and intimacy and what this work has taught Yanitza about herself and about people. Later they talk about how grief affects our capacity to receive, and wha…
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Sulonda, the communication coach, draws from her upbringing in a large family to offer a fresh perspective on relationships. In today’s episode, she tackles the changing face of masculinity, identifying roadblocks and finding solutions, balancing work, love, personal growth, etc. Ultimately, Solanda's initiatives aim to create happier, more peacefu…
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Hey y’all! In this episode Mikey and Randie interview Dr. Jeannelle Perkins-Muhammad on her latest book Into-Me-See: Mastering Black Intimacy for the Relationship You’ve Always Wanted and there’s so much to say. Before beginning the interview, The Chapmans and Dr. Jeannelle share their first memories of feeling safe. Later, the duo learn that findi…
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Did you know that 69% of arguments or conflicts in a relationship go unresolved and this comes from the world-renowned marriage and family therapist John Gottman. Junior and I recently found ourselves in one of these conflicts that just seem to not have a resolution. In this episode, we want to take you through this raw recent conversation that Jun…
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Hey y’all. Mikey and Randie, are back after a hiatus of seven months. And in this episode, they detail what’s changed about them and how having boundaries, self-respect, and faith again has affected them and the podcast for the better. Later, Mikey brings a fight or flight that turns into a poem, wondering when Randie will remember who she is. But,…
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Join us for an exciting and candid episode as Chris Matthews (who has worked in the field of counseling and human services for 18years) and Junior Smith engage in an open dialogue about men's responsibility in marriage. In this thought-provoking conversation, they delve into the challenges of communication, (for both men and women), discuss what ma…
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Gettin’ Free! : A Juneteenth Collaboration brought to you by Sistas Who Kill: A True Crime Podcast. We know that history is told from the side of the victors, but that leaves room for misinformation and false narratives. We are on a mission to change that. 11 Black podcasts have come together to reclaim our history and tell it our way - flavor and …
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Sometimes the challenges that you face in your relationship do not come from within but stem from external factors that may be out of your control. During this time your relationship may be tested and all the things you have been working on or not working on will have an opportunity to be revealed. In this episode, I want to share with you all our …
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Listen to us on: Youtube | iTunes | Spotify | Stitcher | Google Podcasts Didn’t expect a bonus Indie Episode from Randie did you? (Or maybe you did if you caught her latest IG Live) She misses y’all! Mikey and Randie both do. And they want you to consider this episode an apology, an olive branch, and a promise that they will be back sooner than you…
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When I first got married, I was immovable in my stance on cheating. I remember looking into my husband's eyes and saying, "If you ever cheat on me, I will divorce you." It felt like the highest standard I could set for myself because I didnt know any better. I used it as a non-negotiable dealbreaker that safeguarded my heart. Over time my perspecti…
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In this episode, we answer questions we received from our Instagram and TikTok page @blackmarriage therapy. If you have been enjoying the content please follow us on Instagram @blackmarriagetherapy, rate us on your podcast platform, and share your favorite episode with a friend. If you would like to continue the conversation please join our Faceboo…
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Arguing about money early in a relationship has been found to be the No. 1 predictor of whether a couple gets divorced. What is it about money that makes its effects so potent to a relationship? What I have found in my research and experience is that although a lack of money can be an issue by itself most often it is the stress and tension that com…
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It takes a village to raise a marriage. I heard a friend of mine Margert say recently on her podcast that it takes a village to raise a woman and I thought that nothing could be more true. As I started to think about that phrase I realized that this statement was true for so many facets of life including marriage. I thought and considered the villa…
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For the first time in my marriage, I am not putting my needs on the back burner and it feels weird. For the majority of our marriage, I have always put the needs of my relationship over my own. Junior never asked me to do this and for the majority of the time I had no idea that I was not attending to my needs. I ask myself questions like is this a …
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For a long time, sex from a man's perspective has been shrouded in mystery. When discussing sex from a man's perspective it seems to be only one view, Men NEED it and need it OFTEN, but over the years I have found that there are layers to the man's experience with sex in marriage. In season 1 episode 18, I discussed 5 things that transformed our se…
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Even when intentionally trying not to be busy we still end up with things on our plate that must be done in order for our lives to keep moving forward. Here is the real picture, a part of marriage is repetition. Things that happen over and over again are not a bad thing, this monotony can bring a sense of security to a safe place that you call home…
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I used to think that my husband could not handle confrontational emotional conversations. When we would have serious disagreements he seem to retreat internally and offer shallow explanations of how he was feeling. What I found is that my approach to these conflicts was affecting his ability to safely communicate his displeasure with me. In a relat…
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Listen to us on: Youtube | iTunes | Spotify | Stitcher | Google Podcasts. Now whoever thought that making more money and making it out of the valley would scare the hell out of Mikey and Randie? Can you relate? Tune in as the Chapmans detail why abundance has been triggering them and find out how they self-sabotage and re-ground themselves back in …
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This episode is dedicated to a good man Ramces Noel or as he was known to me and many others, Mr. Noel. Mr. Noel, I will miss you and your bright warm smile that the angels in heaven get to enjoy now. I realized that being a good man is often taken for granted but what you have shown me and taught me through your life is that greatness is easy but …
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Listen to us on: Youtube | iTunes | Spotify | Stitcher | Google Podcasts Was an episode with Randie's dad on your bingo card for 2022? Tune in as Big Ran gets interviewed by the shorter half of the Black Millennial Marriage podcast. Together the two detail their happiest childhood memories and later Randie learns what inspired her dad to give up th…
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Listen to us on: Youtube | iTunes | Spotify | Stitcher | Google Podcasts. There are plenty of things Mikey and Randie wished they remembered before they argued. And in this episode, they’re gonna discuss. Tune in as the couple talk about being on the same team, being allowed to be angry, and remembering that they don’t have to internalize the other…
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The first time my husband and I had sex it was surreal. I enjoyed connecting with the person I loved on a deeper physical level. However, the morning after I couldn't help but feel guilty and confused. My mom left education about sex up to the church and the message I received was that sex is for men, my body is not my own and my job is to bring pl…
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Listen to us on: Youtube | iTunes | Spotify | Stitcher | Google Podcasts. Mikey and Randie are finally on the same page. Tune in as the couple detail their current home buying journey, barriers that stopped them in the past, and why, four years since moving into the Bat Cave, they’re finally ready to take action. Later, Randie brings a fight or fli…
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I used to think that I was a stoic person who often had my emotions under control. I felt that emotions only got in the way of accomplishment and success. For a while, this mindset worked for me and helped me to get through difficult moments but as I began to mature and as my relationship with junior began to deepen I came to find out that my lack …
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Listen to us on: Youtube | iTunes | Spotify | Stitcher | Google Podcasts If you find that you're always in some type of f*ck sh*t, then you're the problem. You are the problem. But it's not just you though. In this Indie episode, Randie details reading Codependent No More by Melody Beattie. She explains why she finally read the book, confesses to b…
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Listen to us on: Youtube | iTunes | Spotify | Stitcher | Google Podcasts. Mikey and Randie haven’t had a relationship check-in in a long long time, until today that is. For the inaugural episode of Season 5, tune in as the couple rate sex, family, communication, self, and money on a scale of 1-5. The convo is all things juicy, funny, and enlighteni…
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Are you thinking of getting married but fear that you may not be successful because you didnt have a good example? Maybe you had no example at all, a negative one, or you saw marriage but it wasn't a healthy marriage. If you want to build a marriage and feel that your toolbox is empty or you have the wrong tools it is still possible to be successfu…
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Listen to us on: Youtube | iTunes | Spotify | Stitcher | Google Podcasts. Phew it's been a long long time, and the Chapmans have missed y'all. In this episode, Mikey and Randie explain their impromptu break, read your emails, play your voicemails, and gift Patreon superlatives. Later, Randie brings a fight or flight that questions if Mikey knows th…
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What should I do when the person I love is struggling with their mental health? What happens when the person I have decided to spend the rest of my life with is struggling with anxiety, depression, bipolar disorder, postpartum depression, eating disorder, or PTSD? Can I still love them if they may not be able to fully love me? If you are in this si…
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My husband and I’s in-law story began with a fist fight, a screaming match, and lots of cold shoulders. Our romantic relationship started at the ripe age of 17 so when our families found out we were getting married a year later the reactions were interesting, to say the least. Looking back at the state of those relationships I would have never thou…
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In the past what came to my mind when I thought of toxic relationships were relationships that involved physical, verbal, sexual, and emotional abuse. Over time and from personal experiences what I have learned is that toxicity comes in many different forms shapes and sizes. The forms of abuse I mentioned before are most certainly examples of toxic…
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