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45 minutes. Forty-five minutes does not seem like very much time, but it was a lifetime for Chris and Julie's first child, Faith, and it forever changed Chris and Julie. When the couple excitedly went to Julie's prenatal ultrasound, they first saw beautiful images of their baby but were then given devastating news. Faith was severely ill and doctor…
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Today's guest, Lorraine's young son, AJ, had a smile that would light up a room. Although a heart murmur had been noted at birth, it was thought to have resolved. He was growing and feeding well, and Lorraine had no idea that serious heart abnormality was worsening. The murmur was again noted after a fall at 7 months of age, and AJ was sent to Card…
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When today's guest, Izumi, lost her young daughter, Alyce, to cancer, she felt like she had lost her identity as well. Izumi had given up her corporate job during Alyce's cancer treatment thinking that she would be able to go back after Alyce recovered. Unfortunately, that day never came, and Izumi felt like she had become a completely different pe…
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Today's guest, Linda, says that her life shattered the day a distracted driver killed her 26-year-old daughter, Andrea. Andrea had been living her dream life. She was happily married and an amazing mother to her 2-year-old son. Andrea was pregnant with their second child and worked as a social worker at a job she loved. Linda and Andrea were about …
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Choose Joy. This is the motto that today's guests, Jen and David, decided that their family would follow after a prenatal ultrasound showed that their fourth son AJ would be born with not one, but two newborn abnormalities. He had achondroplasia as well as a rare congenital heart defect. They knew that AJ was facing a complex medical future, but th…
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Since this week's livestream fell on Veteran's Day here in the US, it made Gwen and I think about ideas of sacrifice and honor. We set aside this day to honor veterans and the sacrifices that they made while fighting to defend this country. Military awards are often given as an honor for military heroism or outstanding service. Over a military care…
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Episode 269: David Kessler - David's Dad
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When David Kessler's publicist asked if he could come on the podcast to promote his newest workbook, Finding Meaning: Grief Workbook: Tools for Releasing Pain and Remembering with Love, I felt honored. David Kessler is one of the world's foremost experts on grief and loss. He has written six best-selling books over the years, including two that he …
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'Is life still worth living?' 'Will I ever be happy again? These are questions often asked by bereaved parents. They are asked quietly amongst other grieving parents or therapists. They are often left unsaid entirely but still plague us inside. We are afraid to voice them, afraid to think of what others might do or say - afraid that we will offend …
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Today's guest, Elizabeth, lived through a nightmare after moving her oldest son, Henry, into college. Elizabeth never imagined that on his first day of class, only days after leaving a smiling Henry in his dorm room, he would be killed in a freak accident on campus. Elizabeth's safe world was completely shattered. She learned that accidents happen …
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After Chana lost her oldest son Ryan to a drug overdose five years ago, she was understandably devastated. Still, bit by bit over time, she started to feel like her family may be on its way to recovery. Her second oldest son, Chris, had been crushed when he lost his older brother and best friend. He struggled with relationships and work after losin…
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In the last minutes of this week's interview, today's guest, Ellie, wanted to share one last thing with listeners as she looked back on her 25-year journey of grief after losing her two young children. She compared grief to the ocean. She said that sometimes, the ocean is clear and calm and beautiful while at other times storms come and it feels tu…
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After the death of your child, everything becomes more challenging. Previously easy tasks like going to the grocery store suddenly seem almost impossible. Getting out of bed and showering in the morning no longer feels automatic. You may wonder how you will be able to get through the next weeks, months, and years without your child. In today's podc…
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Today's guest, Marj, always wanted her daughter, Chloe, to be a normal kid. When Marj and her husband first adopted Chloe, she already had medical concerns, but at 20 months of age, their lives were turned upside down when Chloe was diagnosed with cancer. Chloe lived the next 14 years of her life with cancer, but Marj continued to try to make her l…
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Losing a child affects us in ways that we never possibly could have imagined. We are quite honestly not the same people who we were before experiencing this profound loss. When today's guest, Lisa, lost her 19-year-old amazing, talented daughter, Kate, to a rare, aggressive cancer a few months ago, she truly felt lost. She said that she lost confid…
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When Justin Cole started on his peewee football team many years ago, each practice started and ended with a chant. Part of that chant included these words - Never Give Up. As the years went by, the boys eventually stopped playing peewee football, but the friendships continued and the 'never give up' mantra remained important. When Cole suddenly die…
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Before our children are even born, we have dreams for them. We think of what they will be like as babies and the personalities they will develop as they grow. These dreams only get more real after they are born. Clara's dad, Joe, says that as he sang to Clara as a baby, he imagined what it would be like to dance with her as a little girl and even w…
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Episode 259: The Podcast Turns 5
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I cannot quite believe I have been doing the Always Andy's Mom podcast for 5 years. As of today, there have been well over 250,000 downloads in 128 countries as we share stories from around the world. This week, we went back to talk to guests who have been with us from the beginning and others who joined us along the way. Accompanying Gwen and I fo…
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If you listened to last week's podcast, you heard a little bit about what goes on behind the scenes. For example, each week, one to two days before release, I listen to that week's full podcast and try to find an overriding theme I want to focus on for the write-up. This week was no different. but as I listened, I found myself hearing different the…
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This week is one that I have been dreading for a while now. Every year, as the calendar turns to August, I feel my dread and anxiety go up and with that an increase in headaches and other physical symptoms as August 15th comes closer. Last year was especially bad as it was the 5 year anniversary of Andy's death. I thought this year would be better …
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"I don't know how you do it." I have heard this phrase on and off in my life, but that was nothing compared to how often I have heard those words since Andy died. I know people mean well when they say, "I don't know how you do it," but I never really know how to respond. I don't feel any stronger or more resilient than anyone else. Quite the opposi…
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Communication is such an important part of the human experience. We all come from different backgrounds and with different experiences, but being able to communicate with each other and share our own perspectives brings us closer together. When Chezik's 3-year-old son, Yori, drowned in a backyard pool, she was unexpectedly thrust into a completely …
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I have thought a lot recently about blame in the context of grief. When a child dies, it is natural for feelings of blame to emerge. Whether we blame ourselves, blame our child, blame another person, or even put the blame on God, there is a lot of it to go around. Additionally, others can be very vocal about where they feel the blame should be plac…
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From the first email I received concerning Gwyneth and her son, Laird, I was struck with how important friendship was in Gwyneth's life. You see, Gwyneth was not the one who first wrote to me about her story. It was her dear friend, Caroline. Caroline wrote that Laird had been her son's best friend and that she had promised to do whatever she could…
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As Candi sat in the ER after losing her 5-year-old son, Asher, tragically in a farming accident, she wondered how life could go on. The pain was just too great. Candi had seen a therapist for years and knew that her therapist was also a bereaved mom. Candi asked her sister to ask the therapist what she was supposed to do. She answered, "You circle …
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