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Elle is a transgender woman who started this show to talk. Each week, Transgender Woman Talking presents bits of inspiration, encouragement for other trans siblings, and reflections from a perspective down life's road. Elle currently works as a pre-licensed psychotherapist at an LGBTQ community clinic in California. She is happily married with children, and during the two decades prior to transitioning worked as an ordained Christian pastor. Elle can be reached at: twatpodcasting@gmail.com
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After an unplanned hiatus, Elle talks about the learned nature of gender, how gender is socialized, and the validity of gender and sex being changed and performed. She talks about the reasons we might choose to do gender in different ways, including safety, joy, and internal personality alignment. Some of the resources and additional materials refe…
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In this week's installment, Elle talks about a recent tattoo she got commemorating her graduation from therapy school. In addition, she reflects on some of the history and conversation in and around body modifications, including the perjorative accusation of "mutilation". Elle references her tattoo artist, Adrianne Marcella, as well as the work tha…
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On this episode, Elle brings back her book report format, exploring her reactions and thoughts about Taylor Jenkins Reid's masterful novel, The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo. Among the themes included in this monologue are: reflections on allyship, the difficulty of being in the closet, how names and labels for the queer experience have changed ove…
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In this episode of the program, Elle talks about some of her understanding of religious trauma or spiritual abuse. As a former pastor and lifetime member of the Seventh-day Adventist Christian denomination, she resonates very strongly with many of the experiences folks identifying as victims of religious trauma describe. In the program, Elle also r…
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Nex Benedict was a 16 year old trans child who used he/him/they/them pronouns and lived in Oklahoma outside of Tulsa. Early in February, they were bullied to death in the girls bathroom at school. Before passing, video and text messages were captured from Nex reflecting on the experience of the fight that took his life and the years of harassment a…
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Elle talks about some recent experiences she's had with haters, and how she chose to respond. She reflects on some of the principles she's used in the past (and present) for shaping reactions, offering a matrix of priorities that may arrive in a variety of priorities depending on the situation. The themes and topics addressed in this episode includ…
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This week's show features an interview recorded some time ago with one of Elle's coworkers at the LGBTQ Center of the Desert in Palm Springs, Bekki Lorton. They are a nonbinary person who shares their experiences on the path of self-discovery and self-love. In addition to doing community work at The Center, Bekki also worked with exotic animals in …
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This episode concludes (for now) Elle's series asking the question about gender identity, Am I Transgender? This final episode again will work just fine on its own but will be best absorbed in the context of the previous six (linked below). In it, Elle talks about the Erin in the Morning's fabulous response to a transphobic hit piece published by t…
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Elle this week reflects on the stress of existing as a trans person (and more generally a minority person) in the world today. She talks about the weight of discouragement and hopelessness that some trans people get covered by, and why it shows up for us. Among other themes, Elle recommends the work by Erin in the Morning who tracks anti transgende…
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In this episode, Elle reflects about a conversation she had with educators and medical providers at Loma Linda University, a Seventh-day Adventist college and hospital in southern california. The table talk itself was not recorded, but Elle brings her report before, immediately after, and in retrospect of what happened. What she had erroneously tho…
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In this first episode of 2024, Elle interviews a fellow transgender sister, Wendy Cole. Wendy is a transition coach and elder in our community. She speaks about her experiences coming out of the closet as a child in the mid 20th century, what life was like for trans people in the 80s and 90s, and how things changed after 2012. Wendy's wisdom and ki…
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Elle talks about the voices of doubt and self-hate and transphobia that rattle around in our heads -- where they may have come from, and how she navigates them in the present. She reflects on a conversation she once had with Rachel Freemon Sowers (of Road to Radical Visibility) about people's projections on us, in addition to her work in the therap…
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For this week's episode, Elle shares a lecture she gave for SDA Kinship's 42nd annual Kampmeeting held in Riverside, California. Her lecture was given to a small audience of queer Christians in a hotel conference room. The lecture features her reflections on queer and chosen families, the imperfections amongst families, the ways in which we survive…
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This week on the program, Elle interviews the founder and leader of Patchwork, a network of mutual support communities for and by transgender people. In the episode, Stephanie reflects on her own personal journey with gender, some of the key experiences that shaped her, and what she gives her heart and soul to today. In addition, she also discusses…
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During this episode, Elle reflects on some of her experiences with intersecting aspects of marginalization, as well as with enjoying privilege. She highlights the AWIS map of intersecting oppressions and privileges (click here), as well as similar diagrams from Sylvia Duckworth (click here). She talks about how she grew from dismissing systemic rac…
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Mass media portrayals of trans lives can often be downers -- this podcast is no exception. The reality of living as transgender in a transphobic, cissexist, and heterosexist world is that suffering is nearly unavoidable. However, most of us who transition and live our lives authentically do so with the expectation of, and experience of genuine joy.…
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This episode continues Elle's series asking the question about gender identity, Am I Transgender? This edition stands alone but is probably best absorbed in the context of the previous five (linked below). Elle talks about the spiritual nature of her transition, and how she made sense of it as someone who believes in the divine, the camaraderie she…
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In this week's episode, Elle tackles a question submitted by a listener about the mental and emotional effects of hormone replacement therapy. Discussions about the physical bodily results of HRT are discussed ad-nauseum on forums like Reddit, but sometimes the subtle impacts that take place between our ears are lost in the shuffle. For many trans …
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In this week's episode, Elle discusses Laurie Frankel's 2017 book "This Is How It Always Is", now in its second printing from Flatiron Books. The book is a novel about a family with a trans young person, and the trials and travails they all go through navigating a transphobic heterosexist cissexist world. In the episode, Elle discusses some of her …
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This episode is a recording of Elle's most recent creative work, a sermon given at Paradox Church in Redlands, a congregation that is enthusiastically affirming of LGBTQ people, anti-racist, and feminist. Elle's friend Craig is the lead pastor of the church and has invited her several times now to speak to the community. Paradox Church follows the …
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Elle talks about a small ministry based out of her previous denomination, and some of the harmful messages it espouses about queer folks. She discusses and unpleasant online interaction with former ministry colleagues, and her unvarnished responses to their messages. The episode also touches on the following themes and resources: Religious Fundamen…
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Elle talks about her experience over the course of the last year, publishing Transgender Woman Talking Podcast weekly. She reflects on what she's learned about the weekly discipline of creating, regrets about the past and fears about the future, and hopes for how the program will continue to unfold. In addition, Elle invites some feedback from you …
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In this episode, Elle discusses her personality trait of people pleasing, a set of behaviors not uncommon to trans people. She reflects on the sources of this characteristic from her background in religion, and at home, exploring how the interplay of environment and genetics likely produced it. Among other themes, Elle talks about getting our needs…
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Elle takes a stab at reflecting on the movie everyone is talking about - and seeing! In the program she discusses the patriarchy, and gender-based hierarchies in general, asking "How does patriarchy affect trans people?" She also explores some of the overt and covert trans themes in the film, and how the experience of femininity and womanhood expre…
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Elle reflects on the current political conversations surrounding trans people and access to gender-affirming medical care -- which often hinges upon cisgender people's worries about regret. She talks about what the research says about detransition and regret, which is far less common than often portrayed by homophobic haters. Elle discussed and poi…
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Elle talks about her experience with doubt as it relates to gender identity, and transition. She reflects on the cultural pressures prevailing on trans people to "get it right" as well as the personal consequences that come to us when we pretend to know it all in whatever sense. Some of the themes touched in this episode include: passing as a trans…
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Elle continues her series, "Am I transgender?", a question most trans people will ask themselves over the course of their lives (and sometimes, rarely, cisgender people as well). In this episode, she talks about three primary themes that are elements of her answer to the inquiry. New dysphoria that emerges after transition begins, Elle's personal s…
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Elle talks about some aspects of living with a disability, and whether or not trans identities or Gender Dysphoria should be considered as such. The episode begins with a reflection on the brilliant 2020 documentary "Crip Camp" which is now available on Netflix (click here). It continues with exploration of the ways in which transgender identities …
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This week's episode is a re-broadcast of an interview that Elle gave with Rachel Freemon Sowers, host and producer of Road to Radical Visibility podcast, and marriage and family therapist in California. Learn more about Rachel and her work on her website: https://www.rachelfreemonsowers.com/, on her instagram feed: https://www.instagram.com/rachelf…
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During this pride month, Elle offers some unsolicited advice to allies (or would-be allies) out there wishing to improve support of their trans loved ones. This episode is a bit of a continuation from the last one where Elle talked with her wife about how spouses navigate having a partner transition. Some of the themes touched on in this episode in…
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Many of the listeners of Transgender Woman Talking Podcast are cisgender partners of trans people, or other allies. In this week's episode, Elle is joined by her wife of 18 years, Paige, to talk about the experience of a spouse going through transition with their partner. Paige gives advice to cisgender partners out there, and offers some insight a…
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Elle talks about her experiences with Pride and Pride month. Pride has drawbacks and great benefits, effective effects as well as impotent ones. Recently, a Reddit post discussed some of the disappointments we collectively experience when it comes to pride -- Elle adds her own voice to that conversation. She reflects on the political conversations …
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Elle discusses her personal reactions to the novel "Mad Honey" written by Jodi Picoult and Jennifer Finney Boyland (click here for Amazon listing). The book was published late in 2022 and has received many positive reviews, as well as some irrational hate by "aNti wOkE" warriors. In the episode, Elle offers her reflections on reading the novel, and…
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On this week's new episode, Elle reflects on endings, beginnings, graduations, rites of passage, and the nature of change for human beings. This one is out a couple days late due to graduation ceremonies that she participated in over the weekend -- finishing her degree to become a licensed psychotherapist. . As always, thank you for listening, revi…
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This week's episode is the first re-run of the program's history. This one was originally published back in October of 2022 and is one of the most popular of the 40 or so editions now out in the feed. Elle will be back next week with a fresh one. . Should I transition? This is a question a lot of trans people ask themselves at one time or another. …
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Elle discusses the practice (or habit) of avoidance as a coping mechanism for stress. The term, "Ostrich Effect" is sometimes derided in pop-psychology circles as disordered avoidance or dissociation. But she argues that there are times in which it can be effective and even constructive for surviving. In the episode, Elle refers to the current poli…
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Elle continues the series asking the question, "Am I transgender?", an inquiry that comes to the forefront of trans people's mind at some point in their lives or another (or repeatedly). In this iteration of the series, Elle talks about looking at herself in the mirror, disassociation from thoughts and feelings, grieving the childhood and young adu…
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Elle solves the question of the ages (/s) for TWaT listeners this week on the show as she tackles the conundrum of how people change in their lives. Among her reflections on this enormous topic include mentions of her therapeutic approach as studied in her Masters therapy program from Alliant University, Father Richard Rohr's "Falling Upwards" (cli…
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Elle brings you along with her on a trip back to her hometown. Some of her friends share their words of wisdom on the program, and Elle squeezes in a bit of sightseeing in between bouts of homework wrestling. A theme that seems to emerge during this Travelogue episode is Elle's feelings about fitting in (or not), and what it means to be home.. Phot…
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Elle dips her toes into the conversation about Trans Exclusionary Radical Feminists (TERFs) and JK Rowling and her new podcast, The Witch Trials of JK Rowling. She reflects on her internal impulses to condemn and empathize with folks like Rowling -- as well as the strangely validating experience of not being seen, trusted, or heard. Elle refers to …
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Elle talks about things that scared her before she began transitioning; things that froze her into inaction. She reflects on the ways in which fear holds us back, and also about how it can show us the way to courage. This episode touches on so-called "imposter syndrome", Pandora's Box, the validity of transition as a "treatment" for gender dysphori…
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This week, Elle reflects on some of the implications of Trans Day of Visibility. She talks about the benefits and drawbacks keeping secrets (or even maintaining privacy), and the many reasons why trans people may choose to hide aspects of their identities. One of the bits of media Elle references is the documentary "Paris is Burning" (1990) - read …
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Elle talks about the ways in which transition conjures the experience of grief. Quoting the work of Edith Eder (https://schizanthusnerd.com/2020/07/26/the-gift, she reflects on her life experiences with grief, some of the things she has lost in transition, and the mystical way in which grief transmutes to gratitude given enough time and magic. Elle…
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In this episode, Elle talks about her experiences with traveling over the course of her life. She discusses how this privilege has shaped her worldview and enriched her life. At the same time, she also evaluates how this experience has and will change because of her identity as a transgender woman. Included in this episode are the themes of: privil…
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Elle talks about her relationship with family, how the transition has impacted those bonds, and the value of family for queer people in general. She discusses the impact of severed ties -- which sometimes is necessary and important, while also sometimes being incredibly painful and unwanted -- as well as the beauty and challenge of maintaining thos…
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Elle discusses her personal and professional experiences with therapy and mental health. She currently is in school to become a LMFT, and has been a beneficiary of therapists many times over the years. In the conversation, she touches on the negative reputation therapist has within the conservative Christian contexts; the reasons why trans people m…
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In the third installment of the egg-cracking series, Elle discusses additional elements of her experience that led to the discovery and embrace of her identity as a transgender woman. This episode outlines the years of praying Elle had regarding her gender, and how it changed over time. It also explores some of the gender-expansive expressions she …
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Elle discusses the process of choosing a new name as a part of her transition. Included in this are reflections on deadnames, strategies for choosing names, and ritualizing the new name. Though it is very important, she didn't discuss the process of going about legal-name-changing as it is highly variable from state to state. Resources discussed an…
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