People Impact: Layoffs and Survivor’s Guilt with Brad Pinkston (2/2)

Nerd Journey: Career Advice for the Technology Professional

Are layoffs top of mind for you right now? Brad Pinkston is a returning guest and someone who has experienced multiple layoff events in the tech industry from different seats.
In episode 306, Brad shares the story of getting laid off from a small startup. We’ll dissect how he processed that news and eventually returned to big company life. Then, looking at layoffs from a different lens, we talk about feeling survivor’s guilt. Have you ever felt it? Is it wrong to feel it when you didn’t lose your job?
After deciding to continue as an individual contributor, Brad would later become a member of the team he had once managed. Listen closely to hear about the hardest part of that transition and whether Brad sees himself returning to people management someday.
Original Recording Date: 11-21-2024
Brad Pinkston works in technical pre-sales and is a returning guest. If you missed part 1 of this discussion with Brad, check out Episode 305.
Topics – Once Impacted by a Layoff, Examining Survivor’s Guilt, Staying Individual Contributor, Parting Thoughts
2:29 – Once Impacted by a Layoff
* How did Brad process being laid off from the 2nd startup he joined?
* Looking back, Brad can logically see that his position really did need to be eliminated.
* Brad likes to stay on the analytical side of his mind because emotions can easily snowball in situations like these.
* “The startup was taking a chance on trying to create something. After months of trying to create it, it didn’t work. Maybe a bigger company could have taken me and put me in a different place, but this is startup world…. If we’re abandoning the strategy, we’re abandoning people who were hired to execute the strategy, so that’s the way that I analyzed it mentally.” – Brad Pinkston
* The emotional processing of this event was not easy. Brad says he was worried about finances and taking care of his family among other things.
* Brad mentions one of the worst things a manager or leader can say in a layoff situation such as this is how great someone is and that they won’t have any trouble finding a job.
* “If I’m so great, why did you need to eliminate me as opposed to repurposing me or something like that? …That was the biggest emotional reaction I had to the entire thing…. I think that managers or people that have to deliver that news…they say that thinking that it’s going to help you be more confident, but it is not helpful at all. It is a shot to the gut emotionally, so if you’re ever in a place where you have to deliver that news, don’t say that.” – Brad Pinkston, on telling someone being laid off they won’t have trouble finding a job
* John highlights the fact that we as humans don’t react emotionally the same way we intellectually think we should.
* “Our emotional reactions…they just are. Whether or not it makes sense intellectually, it is what happens…. You can do all of the intellectualization that you want. That doesn’t change what the emotional reaction was.” – John White, on how reactions to situations might not make sense
* We might feel that we have failed again or feel worse by having an emotional reaction that intellectually doesn’t make sense. A person can spiral downward quickly this way.
* John has learned to try and give himself grace in these situations (when the emotional reaction does not make logical sense).
* This is the only time Brad has been laid off, and he feels lucky that it’s only happened once.
* Telling people they are going to be fine might cause an emotional reaction.
* Looking at this differently, Brad thinks he would have been upset if the layoff had been completely imperson...