The Power of Positive Parenting: How to Encourage Good Behaviour in Children

The Power Couple Show

Larry and I have been struggling with the terrible twos these days. We've been smacked in the face with our own behavior and are quickly realizing we need to nip our actions in the butt because it is affecting our oldest daughter greatly.

One thing we forget is that she is only two years old. She acts so mature for her age - speech, learning, her speaking full sentences, it just amazes us that sometimes she emotionally acts the way that she does. Lately, we've been noticing she's been craving more of our attention... so you know what that means she's doing? Tantrums... Hitting... Bullying... Coming out of her room and nap-time and bedtime... Anything to get a big reaction out of us.

So, something we've learned and that we're starting to implement is that we need to change OUR behavior. She's learning from us!

Boy, that's a smack in the face, right?

We need to change our behavior to encourage better learned behavior on her part... So this may look like ignoring a tantrum or hitting someone, and instead praising the good behaviors she does all of the time... It might look like making bed time more enjoyable and a quality-time focused event where we make it enjoyable for her and give her more autonomy so there is less of a power struggle by asking her questions that make her feel like she's in control. Or giving her the power to say "night night book, instead of just taking it away."

Demonstrating more emotionally intelligent behavior, speaking to her nicely, and treating her with respect is going to yield a far greater outcome than yelling, spanking, or taking away her toys... You know what that will teach her? To yell, hit when she doesn't get what she wants, or to take a toy away from another child.

So, this realization came in one of OUR late night talks because it's been a real problem. And we want to be solution focused, not place blame on one another, and be the best parents we can be for our girls.

So, if you are having some difficulties with your kids I want to give you some key practices to work through with your partner... Because you two need to be united in your parenting so that you are consistently providing the same example behavior and encouraging the same good behaviors.

1. I want you to write down three behaviors you've noticed in your kids that are troublesome.
2. Now, I want you to write down three behaviors you are doing that may be teaching them each of those troublesome behaviors.
3. Now, talk with your partner about these behaviors you're demonstrating and how it correlates with the behavior your child is showcasing.
4. How are you going to be better today?

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