Episode 40 Wave After Wave: Carmen's Story

The Timeless Gospel

In episode 40, we have coupled two of Larry's most wonderfully powerful sermons on the subject of God's sovereignty.

Hear how our very special guest, Carmen, tells her story of sexual abuse and how these truths from Larry's sermons, coming to her through Larry's protégés, started her miraculous healing journey.

Carmen references Daniel's teachings on The Song of Songs with such joy, bringing to light the close relationship she indeed has with her Lord. Beau Jenkins, in his teaching through Romans, has had tremendous affect on Carmen, giving her "wave after wave" of refreshing good news, revealing God's character and sovereign hand in even the most tragic circumstances. You can find Beau's sermon featured in our discussion here.

Also, in the discussion portion, we mention a few things we should consider as we try to support victims of sexual assault. We are learning from a wonderfully rich book written on the subject of sexual abuse called Rid of My Disgrace. We have decided to include this important section of the book here:

What to Say and What Not to Say to a Victim of Sexual Assault

What to Say

Below is a list of things to say that would support and encourage a victim:

I’m sorry this happened to you.

I believe you.

Thank you for telling me.

How can I help?

I’m glad you’re talking with me.

I’m glad you’re safe now.

It wasn’t your fault.

Your reaction is not an uncommon response.

It’s understandable that you feel that way.

You’re not going crazy; these are normal reactions following an assault.

Things may not ever be the same, but they can get better.

It’s okay to cry.

What Not to Say

Hurtful reactions toward a victim may be intentional (victim blaming), or they may arise from ineffective attempts to show compassion by people who mean well but are uninformed. Below is a list of things not to say because they shame, blame, or doubt the victim:

I know how you feel.

I understand.

You’re lucky that____didn’t happen.

It’ll take some time, but you’ll get over it.

Why don’t you tell me more details about what happened.

Don’t worry; it’s going to be all right.

Try to be strong.

Out of tragedies good things happen.

Time heals all wounds.

It was God’s will.

You need to forgive and move on.

Calm down and try to relax.

You should get on with your life.

-Justin S. Holcomb & Lindsey A. Holcomb

Rid of My Disgrace is found here.

You can find this podcast on youtube at the Timeless Gospel. Please subscribe to the channel and leave a comment on an episode you found edifying.

Email your questions to [e-mail]