ITL293: How to Teach Your Child Self-Control

In the Loop with Andy Andrews

In this episode, we answer a listener’s question on self-control. You can’t force real change in your child.

• Most parents who want their child to change, try to force the change by setting tight rules.
• To change someone you need two things: what’s in it for me, and proof beyond a reasonable doubt.

Have conversations with your child about their future.

• Get specific about where they want to go in life.
• Tell them you want the best for them, and explain why that change is in their best interest.
• You discipline them so that they can discipline themselves later in life.
• Since the best is only one thing, you can be wrong. Let your kids know they can talk to you if they disagree with you.

How important is it for parents to present a united front?

• It makes things easier.
• The reason parents don’t present a united front is because they disagree.
• If it’s a difference of opinion, compromise. If it’s a disagreement over a course of action, have a conversation about it without fighting.

Tune in to hear how Andy parents and communicates with his kids.

You can also hear more from Andy by subscribing to his new podcast, The Professional Noticer. Just go to AndyAndrews.com/podcast for details.

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